Avoidance…..I do this. Sometimes when things get too hectic and I don’t know what to do, I avoid. Hiding, running, whatever you want to call it. This is my response when things are out of control. Up until a few days ago, I didn’t even know I did this. It can be so hard to take a real look at yourself and see what you’re doing wrong. I think I avoid because of the fear I have of doing thing. I never want to make a mistake or disappoint anyone. But now I can see that this the worst thing I can do. If I never deal with anything, I just leave a trail of unfinished business. Problems that I never get around to dealing with. I may have thought I was dealing with my pain by ignoring it, but the truth is that I was only allowing it to build up. And when things are not dealt with, they only show back up later on in life. It was not allowing me to fully enjoy my life. In 2013 I promise myself to be active in dealing with life’s problems. Sometimes confrontation can be good for a person. It helps you to better understand what matters to you. Because you should always defend what you care about. I see now that I have to do what makes me happy even if it doesn’t line up with what others want for me. I have had such a hard time with my family for the past two years. Whatever I do, they never seemed to be pleased with me. I said I didn’t care, but deep down it hurt me. I just couldn’t understand why nothing I did was good enough for them. But as long as I am doing what God has planned for me, I don’t have to worry about pleasing anyone else.
I heard a minister say that no great leader fit in with the crowd. Sometimes the fact that you don’t fit in or that you are different from everyone around you, and want different things is a sign that God has something great planned for you. You cannot lead others if you are just the same as them. So this year I vow to consult with God on all things. And when someone disagrees with what I do, or who I choose to live my life, I will not avoid them . I will confront them and let them know that as long as God loves me and has no problem with what I do, I will continue to do what makes me happy. I am looking forward to this year. I feel like there are a lot of great things in store for me.